LETTERS
DEAR WINOS,
I thought I should
share this exciting new news with you!
BENTONVILLE, ARK (AP) -- Some Wal-Mart customers soon
will be able to sample a new discount item: Wal-Mart's own brand of
wine. The world's largest retail chain is teaming up with E&J Gallo
Winery of Modesto, California, to produce the spirits at an affordable
price, in the $2-5 range.
While wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to throw a bottle of
Wal-Mart brand wine into their shopping carts, there is a market for
cheap wine, said Kathy Micken, professor of marketing at Roger Williams
University in Bristol, R.I. She said: "The right name is important." For
example, Micken suggested the following 12 names might appeal to the
targeted consumer:
The top 12 suggested names for Wal-Mart Wine:
12. Chateau Traileur Parc
11. White Trashfindel
10. Big Red Gulp
9. Grape Expectations
8. Domaine Wal-Mart "Merde du Pays"
7. NASCARbernet
6. Chef Boyardeaux
5. Peanut Noir
4. Chateau des Moines
3. I Can't Believe It's Not Vinegar!
2. World Championship Riesling
1. Nasti Spumante
The beauty of Wal-Mart wine is that it can be served with
white meat (possum) and
red meat (squirrel).
| Inebriatingly yours,
BOOZER BOB
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